Apr 30, 2013

dreams, saying yes, an ugly heart and a whole lot of grace - oh and a giveaway

I'm going to apologize right now because this post is a whole bunch of rambling and zero pictures but stick with me, it might be pretty good. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I'm not a great writer but here goes.

If you remember this post I talked about my pessimistic attitude and how it has hindered me from dreaming big dreams. This year has already been a dream-come-true kind of a year and I'm so excited to see God working in all of it.

About a year ago I wrote this post. It was hard for me. I was kind of scared to put it all out there but decided to trust God and say okay. It's kind of funny to me looking back on how fearful I was and yet a lot of those feelings crept on me again recently.

You probably know I have an etsy shop where I sell prints, cards and other things I design. I started that shop a little over two years ago after I quit my job as a senior designer to be a stay-at-home mom. While I love being home with my at-the-time one girl, I missed having a creative outlet. I worked on some contract and freelance work here and there but there was something missing.

I designed some prints for friends and decided to open my own online shop and see if I could sell some, having absolutely no goal or clear vision in mind. It was mainly my little creative outlet and if it helped my family out a bit financially - even better.

Once I opened my shop I remembered how much I enjoyed designing. It was fun because I could do what I wanted and didn't have clients telling me to make changes I didn't think needed to be made :)

I couldn't tell you how many sales I had that first year because I didn't really care. It was humbling and exciting that people liked my work and were buying it!

Last year I felt God calling me to do something and give back. I don't want to list specifics here but I will say that it had to do with 100% of certain profits being given back to Him. I said yes and didn't realize what God would have in store for me.

I wanted to add customizable Christmas cards to my shop but wanted them to somehow bring glory to God so I designed cards with Christmas hymns and Bible verses.

God was good, as He always is and blessed my little shop which in return, blessed my family as I was able to help us out a little financially. I never would have dreamed how much success my little shop had this past year and how many incredible friends I've met along the way through custom designs, stories and emails. God is good.

When it came time for me to follow through on that commitment I made to God, it was hard. I wouldn't say I struggled with it because I had already said yes but my flesh reared up and I was all, "man, I didn't know it was going to be like THIS!" And let's be clear, the success I've had has not been my own. I believe God blessed my shop in that time because I followed Him when I didn't know where He was taking me. However, I would be lying if I didn't feel a tinge of, "I worked so hard," "this would really, really help out my family," or worst of all, "I could really use a new..(insert any material item here)" Know what I mean? But like I said, my yes was already out there and I knew what I had to do - so I did.

A couple months went by and do you know what happened?!

We found our dream land and were able to buy it.

Coincidence? I'll let you be the judge but I believe God is faithful and He gives us what our heart desires. My heart's desire wasn't land. It has been to just have the courage to say yes when He calls. And I do believe God blesses in ways you and I can never even dream - even if it's getting something you know you don't deserve but really, really want.

If the story ended there, it would be pretty awesome, right?

But it doesn't. God is big. God is good.

Remember how I said those fears started creeping up on me again?

Well, I have a variety of prints in my shop, ranging from verses to quotes to lyrics to verses and anything in between. I add prints here and there when I have time but I started looking at my shop and thinking about some new prints I wanted to add when I started having those fears, "of offending someone, getting too personal, automatically having a label on me, my life being put on a pedestal of sorts because people can think you're supposed to be perfect and then letting those people down because it's easy to see my many imperfections, fear of saying or doing something that reflects poorly on my faith and being judged accordingly, not having the answer to a question ... the list goes on and on." 

I wondered if maybe I had a little too much God in my shop for the world.

There. I said it. Hello ugly heart.

And just as soon as I thought it - I smiled, after asked for forgiveness and thanked Him for grace :)

I smiled because God is in my shop. Which is exactly what I wanted from the beginning - to some how bring glory to Him. The prints with His words that He let me design have been bought and hung in people's homes.

What an honor and a blessing. What a crazy thought for this little stay-at-home-mom in Oklahoma that is in NO WAY close to perfect and that in NO WAY deserves the grace He has given me. What a blessing.

After I realized that God can been glorified by a sinner like me through some little graphics I design in a little shop online, I added a new print that came from a quote from "Kisses from Katie." I thanked God for allowing me to spread his love in my shop and glorify Him doing what I love to do.

I just had my 500th shop sale.

And then I had my 600th sale.

I feel I need to be clear again, this is not a celebration about the numbers in those sales - although they have been a financial blessing, it's what those sales mean.

There are over 600 things from my shop that people have bought and even if it wasn't a Bible verse, or hymn or whatever they got - those people may have just seen a little bit of Jesus just from being in my shop.

And that my friends is the craziest thing of all and something worth celebrating.

I don't know what's next for my life or shop, maybe this is where this part of the story ends or maybe there's more to it, who knows. I just pray I'll say yes again. And again. Even when it's scary.

So thank you for sitting through this ridiculously long post and reading my rambles - I would give you a cookie if I could.

Since I don't have a cookie to give you, I want to give someone a copy of the book that has changed my life in so many ways, Kisses from Katie. Katie's words and honestly have taught me more about loving others, parenting, following God and so many other things than any devotional or Bible study I've ever read and I want her words to bless someone else.

If you want a chance at a free copy, leave me a comment and I'll randomly select a winner on Friday and announce the winner Monday. Oh, and please, only one comment per person.

Thanks friends and have a fantastic day!

70 comments:

  1. I love this story, and you definitely don't have too much God in your shop! I love all your prints. If I didn't have such a phobia about hanging things/putting holes in the walls, I would have already bought some! (As it is I have way to many things framed and leaning against walls... travesty!)

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  2. Congratulations on ALL of your successes- business and personal. :) I'd love to be entered to win a copy!

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  3. Oh, goodness, I totally understand what you're saying about the ugly heart thing! It's amazing what comes out of us when we least expect it! So glad our loving God gently corrects us and shows us the way He wants us to walk!

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  4. lesley.
    this testimony blesses me SO dang much.
    amen! praise jesus for his grace when we have ugly hearts, and his ridiculous mercy that shines him so brightly through our crazy selves.
    congrats, press on! love you
    and gimme that book ;)

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  5. This is amazing. I LOVE that print you designed...it's SO true, and such a good reminder for when our babies wake us up so early in the morning.
    I am so glad you are telling your story and sharing how you've been blessed. It's hard to follow the Lord's leading sometimes and when it becomes so clear that you did what you were supposed too, it's amazing! We tried to raise money in our shop for Compassion International (http://couplejones.wordpress.com/2013/03/04/lets-do-something-good/) because we felt like the Lord was leading...our numbers are far smaller but just stepping forward in faith has been an awesome lesson. You are rad! :)

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  6. Great post! Amazing how obedience pays off.

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  7. So excited for you and to see your shop grow! He really does provide when we least expect it.

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  8. congrats lady.
    that kisses from katie print is your best one yet.
    seriously.
    i'm so thankful that you listened to the Lord, and created and sold it.

    every morning, it helps me gain perspective. i tell you this out of true honesty. i think, okay how much of today is getting by on the coffee, and how much is getting by on Jesus.
    its cute, and quirky, but a great reminder than Jesus > anything else
    (even delicious coffee).

    keep sharing your heart. God is using you.

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  9. Love your work and the Kisses from Katie inspired one. Probably my favorite!!

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  10. I've not read Kisses from Katie, but it sounds like I should. This was a great post! Thanks!

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  11. Lesley! This was absolutely beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us. I know it touched mine. God is so good, even though we are sinners and don't deserve his goodness. I'm constantly in awe of his incredible Grace every. single. day. I could constantly talk about his love, his goodness, and his grace. And he's not looking for the most "insert-word-here" person...he's just looking for people to say "yes." Proud of you, my interwebs friend...for saying yes. :)

    And one of my friends was telling me I need to read Kisses from Katie. I plan on putting in in my queue!

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  12. What an amazing testimony!! So proud of you and the people you have possibly reached thru all of your hard work!! Thanks for the giveaway also.

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  13. Thanks for being real. You know there is not a single person out there who hasn't struggled at some point in time with a thought like that. We all have "ugly hearts" sometimes! None of us deserve his sacrificial grace but he gives it to us anyway! Congrats on your shop's success and what a great way to use your talents for his glory. You're an inspiration! :) That book has been recommended by several bloggers I read and it is on my "to-read" list...

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  14. Great post, I have so struggled with ugly heart feelings in my photography business. Love the encouragement here.

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  15. What a truly uplifting and inspiring story! you never know what God will do when you rest in Him and let Him take over. So happy to see what He has done (and will do) in your life, and the life of your family. <3

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  16. "God is in my shop." You got me with that line. Lump in throat. So awesome to watch you be faithful, even when it's not easy. He is using you for his glory, and ain't NUTHIN better than that.

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  17. Thanks for sharing :) would love to read this book!

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  18. So good! I've had such an ugly heart lately. But thank you for the reminder that God gives grace. I need it!

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  19. Lesley, I would love to sit down over coffee with you and just chat! I think we would find we have a lot in common and struggle with some of the same icky thoughts. And believe me, I know all about "clients telling me to make changes I don't think need to be made." :)

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  20. What a sweet & heartfelt post! Just recently started following you on IG. What a mighty and amazing God we serve! Your honesty and transparency is a reflection of His love in you! Thanks for shining for Him!!

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  21. Thanks for sharing and being so transparent! I love Katie's blog but haven't read her book yet!! I love the print you made based on her book...I can't wait to get one!

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  22. Well, I was going to leave a comment anyway...but a chance to win Katie's book just sweetens the deal. I loved your words. It's amazing what happens when we are faithful to God. A very inspiring post for sure! Our God is awesome!

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  23. Beautiful words! Thank you for being vulnerable & sharing this! I LOVE my coffee & Jesus print and LOVE Katie's book! It's in my top three favorite books ever for sure! So much so that, not only have I given it as a gift several times but I bought an extra copy and have been circulating it among my friends so everyone I know can read it. I just love her heart and the way the Lord challenged me through her.

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  24. I read the book and loved it too. But after you read it, you say to yourself "Now what God?". It changes you.

    But seriously, you are a sweetheart. And brave to put this all out there. I love, love, loved my Christmas card and both of my prints.

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  25. Lesley, this is so great! I am so happy that you are following God and that He is blessing you along the way. I almost didn't comment for a chance to get a free copy of the book. I've been avoiding it. I fear reading things that I know will make me cry. Sigh... I fear change, and changes of the heart are sometimes the scariest. :)

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  26. Lesley, I had this pit in my stomach that this post would end with, "so, I'm closing my store and not designing anymore." I'm so glad it didn't! I loved every word.

    Your designs have been my Christmas cards the last two years and I receive amazing feedback on them.

    Each morning as I stumble down the stairs (well, only once did I really stumble and fall and break my leg), one of your designs greets me at the last turn in a frame on the gossip bench in my foyer.

    I love your style and taste and design. For sure not "too much God" and I love that you have a variety.

    He's given you dreams you didn't even know you had!

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  27. If you loved that book (you know I did being the momma to 2 Ugandan babies!) , you have to follow it up with love does! :)

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  28. Oh man. Your words hit such a special chord in my heart "to just have the courage to say yes when He calls" Those words spoke right to my heart in just the way I needed. Thank you sweet, Lesley. It can be scary initially to step out in faith but also unspeakably wonderful. When it's the Lord igniting the dream, let's just trust & obey for there's no other way!

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  29. Incredible post! Thank you for sharing. And I don't know how you could possibly worry about offending anyone. I love reading your blog, it always inspires me!

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  30. I found your blog through Instagram. I just wanted to thank you. Thank you for saying yes to the Lord. Thank you for putting your heart on the line. Thank you for opening up and sharing. Through your words, the Lord has touched my heart tonight. While reading through your post, I felt courage and peace. I won't write my life story out here :) but I just wanted to say thank you. God is so so good and I just love how he uses others to touch and change his beloved children. Thank you.

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  31. What an amazing testimony Lesley! I'm so glad you've been blessing us all with your work! My family certainly loves looking at the beautiful prints we own! Thanks for writing and saying yes! God bless!

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  32. This is so great. What a refreshing gift to receive grace for our ugly hearts. Jesus is the mighty friend of sinners.

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  33. i'm new to your blog (i've been hanging around your sister's for awhile and finally decided to jump over here) but i already deeply admire your heart. saying yes is so hard sometimes, but the world would be so radically transformed if we all just said yes to Jesus more. so thank you for your yes and your commitment to advancing the Kingdom.

    also, i'm gonna be at hope spoken and i just cannot even wait to meet you. :)

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  34. I would love to win this to give away!! It's one of my favorites too! Loved this post, Lesley!! So amazing to see God's abundant blessing when we are obedient and faithful to what He has called us to. There's no formula for the abundance of God...there's just relationship.

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  35. This is so encouraging as an at home momma of two girls :) I know you may get some ugly comments for today's post, but thank you for being so open and honest about your faith. You worded it so well, without pushing it on others. I would love to read Kisses from Katie!

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  36. I've actually bought that book for three different people but haven't read it myself. I read her blog and her life / what God has done through her is CRAZY. So challenging to my all too comfortable life. i'd love to read it myself!!

    Jen

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  37. I am the proud owner of that print! Thank you! Now I must read the book!

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  38. Thanks for the encouragement; good words on a day that was seeming...well, mundane :) BTW--I have your "not all who wander" print (we're a military family) and EVERYONE who comes to visit raves over it--puts our life into words! I also learned of Love146 a few years ago--such an awesome organization; I ordered your "Love" print, too, after I saw it in your shop and that you were donating to a cause that I hold very dear. May you find the blessing of continued peace in your courage, joy in your days!

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  39. This really ministered to me as my faith in God was tested big time today. I would love to read a copy of that book.

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  40. First of all, I loved this post - amazing Hugs and hugs and lots of love

    And, I've always wanted to read that book :)

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  41. As a fellow believer, Tulsan and designer/art director turned SAHM, I love reading your blog. Congrats on the shop, following the dream and all the other things that God is doing in your life.

    Please put me in for the drawing. I have so been meaning to read the book.

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  42. Great story! I love reading about your shop and wish I had as much courage as you do!

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  43. Thanks for the chance to win- and that's for having God in your shop... because I love the Coffee/Jesus print!
    p.s. I do wish you could hand me a cookie through the computer- I drool over all your recipes!!

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  44. Thank you for all the rambling! I wish that I could be a SAHM again, but that's kind of impossible as a single/divorced mom. Good for you for following Him and saying yes! My how He's smiling down on you. I'm taking the link for the book to read more about it, but I'd love to win it too!

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  45. beautiful ramblings lesley, i love it, i'm quite the fan (not in a stalkerish sense either) :) ... and i would love it if my name was picked!!!

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  46. I love All your prints! I have one displayed in my home already and are eyeing many more! I am so happy for all your success and that you are sharing Jesus with us all! :) And I've been waiting to read that book!

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  47. I've followed your sister for a while and am now going to follow your lovely blog! You are two amazingly gifted and humble women. And I'm super excited to follow along on your journey of building a house (which I'm assuming will follow the purchase of land)!
    Would love a new book :)
    Oh, and I just shared your print on my blog the other day!

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  48. that book was incrediable. love love loved it

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  49. what a great post...congrats to you and for your giving the glory to God, what a great testimony! I have one of your LOVE prints in my daughter's room and just love it and the fact that God is in your shop! :)

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  50. This is beautiful. So glad you chose to be faithful & he couldn't help but be faithful in return!

    And ps..I really wanna read that book! :)

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  51. Lesley, I love your sweet heart and your obedience :) And that print is my most favorite ever!

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  52. Thanks so much for sharing. I love reading about how our God is fulfilling your wildest dreams! Your posts on dreaming big have been very challenging and are encouraging me out of my comfort zone. :)

    Brittany

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  53. May blessings abound for you and your family as you start down a new path!

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  54. Your words make my heart full. :)

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  55. So wonderful. I read Katie's blog a few years ago and had no idea she wrote a book. would be great to win it.

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  56. How fabulous! Congrats to you! I recently closed my etsy shop, but hope that maybe someday when I have my own kiddos I can do freelance on the side and make pretty things to sell.

    Sometimes it's hard to face those dreams and explain them to the accounting husband, but I think as time goes on and we get closer to that moment his heart will open up and he'll see benefits!

    Congrats again!

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  57. Thank you for sharing. I have been eyeing your work and debating how to spend my etsy gift certificate my sister gave me for Christmas. I think I now know where it is going ;) Now to choose....

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  58. Wow!! That touched my heart in so many ways. Thank-you from the bottom of my heart. Love you and The Recipe for CRAZY blog. Have a BLESSED Week-end.

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  59. Thank you so much for your honesty. I have an equally yucky heart. You are a fabulous designer and I love all the beautiful biblical statements you have in your shop. :)

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  60. Just discovered your shop, love it :)

    -Tracie K

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  61. I needed this post today!
    - Elizabeth W.

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  62. wow...beautiful heart, beautiful spirit, and a beautiful step in your journey to fully follow God's plan for you. what an great inspiration for me to have today...i really need to remember that it is all for HIM!!!

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  63. Such an inspirational, honest post about how we all feel at times - desiring to give God our best, but also wanting to appease the world. It feels like such a hard balance, sometimes, but it sounds like you are doing great! Sounds like a great book - I'd love to read it!

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  64. So beautifully written and a beautiful print! :)

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  65. Have been reading things here and there about you and thought I better check it out! Loved today's blog, and a give a way to boot!! Keep up the good work!

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  66. Beautifully written! So thankful that you are trusting your life and business to the Lord! Grateful to keep up with another serving Christian stay-at-home mom. :) Keep posting!

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  67. Thanks for sharing. It is encouraging.

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  68. Wow! God is good. He used you through the power of the Holy Spirit to speak straight to my heart. You sharing your heart has richly blessed my life. May God continue to bless you and your family. Thank You.

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  69. Thank you for being so honest!! Enjoyed this post, and I realize I am not alone. Keep up the good work!!

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I know it can be a little scary but go on, I'd love to hear from you!